Sadie: A Novel

Sadie is worth all the praise and hype you’ve heard about it. I had a feeling I was going to love this book, but I didn’t know that I would give it a piece of my heart. This is such a bright light in 2018 releases, and even though it handles some really tough topics, I recommend it with my entire heart and soul. And I will never forget Sadie or her story, and I will never stop listening to, and I will never stop believing, the voices of girls who have their own stories to tell.This story is told in alternating chapters between a podcast and Sadie. We follow nineteen-year-old Sadie who is on a mission to murder the person who she believes has murdered her thirteen-year-old sister. The podcast is about five months behind the steps of Sadie, but the two storylines come together so very beautifully. But again, this is a dark book and this review is going to talk about some of those elements, so please use caution. Content and trigger warnings for pedophilia, loss of a loved one, bullying, assault, sexual assault, murder, death, extreme parental abandonment and neglect, talk of suicide, drug use, and underage drinking.We get bread crumb after bread crumb from Sadie, while she travels to get revenge for her sister, the only person she has ever loved in this world. And the story really is so expertly crafted with the podcast element. I will say that I did listen to this on audiobook because so many people recommend the story to be experienced that way, but I didn’t love it as much as most people. But then again, I do have a hard time with audiobooks. But I fell so in love with Sadie and her story, that I listened to this in one day and one sitting.And I know a lot of people don’t love the ending, but I think it is one of the most powerful endings I’ve probably ever read in my entire life. Plus, I feel like the choice of the cover of Sadie is genius, because Sadie truly is a faceless girl. She is a girl like so many whose stories don’t get to end happily, a girl whose story rarely even gets to be heard, and when it does it isn’t believed.Something that I think is a really easy concept, but is hard for so many people to understand, is that rapists and pedophiles can be kind, and successful, and funny, and pillars of their community, and it will still never take away from the fact that they are rapists and pedophiles. The other titles and attributes do not lessen the fact that someone is a rapist or a pedophile. And how we teach girls at a very young age that the crimes committed against their bodies, and against their wills, is something to feel shame over. And how we live inside a broken system where rapists can commit the same horrific crime over and over, because no one wants to listen or believe the victims, especially if they are poor and uneducated. And Courtney Summers really illustrates that point so very beautifully throughout Sadie. Because our own world proves every day that people would rather believe powerful men over loud girls. But Sadie takes action into her own hands, and reclaims her power, her body, and her heart, along with getting her vengeance. And it is one of the best journeys I’ve ever experienced.“Sometimes I don’t know what I miss more; everything I’ve lost or everything I never had.”I also want to talk a little bit about the representation in Sadie. First off, Sadie has a very severe stutter. I didn’t know this going in, and as a matter of fact I don’t think I’ve ever read a book where the main character has a stutter before, but it was perfection. Heartbreaking perfection though, because seeing Sadie unable to get the worlds out when she was feeling extreme anger or sadness was so heart wrenching. But Sadie always got the words out, and she always got her hurt across, and it was so beautifully done. Also, I know the scene is brief, but Sadie is so not straight, if anything she sounds rather pan to me. Lastly, Sadie has some of the most realistic poverty rep I’ve ever read, and I still feel like in 2018 that is something that is hard to find.And I obviously think Sadie is a masterpiece of a story, and the themes are so important and relevant, but I think the biggest reason I loved this book so much was because I felt so connected to Sadie because of what she felt for Mattie. I will be completely honest with you all, I wouldn’t want to live in a world without my little brother. Me and my brother are a bit closer in age than Mattie and Sadie, and we were never abused or neglected, but the pure unconditional love that Sadie feels for Mattie, and how responsible and protective she felt, it was so pure and so realistic and just completely ripped out my heart and left me feeling so raw and vulnerable. I would do anything in the universe to protect my little brother, and I feel like I fell in love with this book just because Sadie’s love for her sister resonated so strongly in my very soul. There is a line in this book about Sadie feeling alive when her sister comes home from the hospital, and how she laid a hand on her baby sister’s chest and felt her breathing, and I was uncontrollably weeping while reading it. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the love I have for my brother depicted so closely than to that passage, and I know I will carry that inside my heart forever.“I stood over her crib and listened to her breathing, watching the rise and fall of her tiny chest. I pressed my palm against it and felt myself through her. She was breathing, alive. And I was too.”Overall, this book just really meant a lot to me. And even though this book is heartbreaking, it has some of the most beautiful quotes I’ve read all year. I read it with tears in my eyes for at least half, but I wouldn’t trade this reading experience for anything. And I am now going to read every single thing Courtney Summers has created. I truly loved this one, and I recommend it with my entire heart and soul, especially if you have a close sibling relationship, if you enjoy murder mystery podcasts, and if you also want to change the world so that more victims’ voices not only get heard but get believed.

This was a really good book. I really enjoyed the way it went back and forth from Sadie to the podcast.The only thing missing for me was the ending...I needed more...I needed closure.

Sadie was hard to read because of the reminder that the fight for justice is always going for the girls that are afraid to speak up and the justice for the girls who face evil and hope when they dkk ok they don’t end up being another dead girl.

At the time I’m writing this review, it’s been a couple of days since I finished Sadie, and I still haven’t fully processed it. This is one of those stories that seeps into your bones somewhere along the way, and it changes the way you look at the world a little. It is the best mystery—and one of the best books, period—that I have ever read, and it is also one of the bleakest, most devastating reading experiences of my life.You know, going into this story, that Sadie’s little sister’s body has just been found, and Sadie is on a mission to track down the man she believes is responsible. Besides the fact that it’s a story partially told through podcast episodes (which is such an incredible touch), that’s all you really need to know. This isn’t about what happens so much as it is about coming to know and love Sadie—and to know and love Mattie, too, through her memories. It’s about recognizing that the society we live in has this terrifying, grimy layer that nobody wants to talk about, where little girls are never really safe, and children are forced to grow up way too fast, to become adults in replacement of the parents they didn’t ask for.With a mother suffering from addiction, a community that looked the other way far too many times, and a life of barely keeping food on the table, much less having any real opportunities to succeed, Sadie feels like such an old soul. I don’t know how many readers will struggle to relate to the age of her inner monologue, but from another woman whose circumstances never quite allowed me to feel like a child, I saw so much of myself in the cynical, pragmatic way Sadie views the world around her.It’s hard enough to grow up poor and in a broken family, but Sadie’s also queer—she doesn’t label herself, but explains her sexuality in ways that heavily point to pansexuality—and she stutters, which forms a barricade between her and the rest of the world. Her representation feels so valid and genuine, and it broke my heart every time she mused about how imprisoned she felt by her struggles with speech.More than anything else about Sadie’s character, though, I loved the fierce, maternal determination she has for taking care of Mattie—and, once Mattie is gone, for finding her killer and dishing out justice. Every memory of Mattie, whether told through her view of their adopted grandmother May Beth’s, is beautiful and haunting. The tremendous amount of guilt that Sadie carries as she blames herself for what went wrong had me completely breaking down in passages, and I’ll admit without shame that I read the last several chapters through tears. The most brutal part of it all is that, somehow, it feels like Sadie’s story could be based on a real girl—no, on countless real girls, all over the world.Without spoiling the plot, I want to warn you that this book focuses heavily on child abuse and sexual assault, and it is broken down in the most honest, agonizing ways. There’s also a solid portrayal of how deceptive abusers can be, as the abusers in question are shown to have fooled so many people. But there’s also another side to the representation here, as we see Sadie’s intense solidarity with other abused girls, and her desperate need to protect and defend them, even though (perhaps especially though) she feels that she failed to protect and defend her sister.There’s not much else I can tell you now, because I think it’s the kind of story that you should go into without too many expectations. Just climb in, let Sadie take you for a ride and tell you her story, and try not to let your heart get too broken in the process. This is a phenomenal story, and I know that I will be thinking about it for a long, long time to come.

I took this away with me on holiday and devoured it in less than a day. It was absolutely amazing and the second I'd finished it I messaged a bunch of friends to tell them they simply had to read it. I don't want to give away any spoilers so won't talk about the plot or go into too much detail, but the characters were incredible and 100% felt like real people (far too often I read books and think to myself, 'No one is like this in real-life....').The format, half from Sadie's POV in first person, and half podcast transcript really worked for this story. It was a format I'd never seen before and I hadn't realised before I started reading it that that's what it was, but I'm almost glad I didn't know because it might have put me off a bit and I might have looked over one of the best books I read in 2019.I have to applaud Courtney Summers for being fearless in her writing, she tackles difficult subjects with sensitivity and skill, and that ending... well it's a work of genius is all I'll say. I can't recommend this book highly enough, even months later I'm still thinking about it (and still recommending it to anyone who asks me what they should read next). I don't say this often but I wish I could give it more than five stars because it was honestly that good.

This book is incredible. It is absolutely breathtaking. What a page-turner, it will have you reading it in one go and you'll be left feeling bereft and shaken. You'll feel helpless and sad, but also kind of relieved and proud. Proud of Sadie and all she was able to accomplish, despite the lack of closure you (as a reader) get in the end.Everyone's going nuts over the ending, but I found the ending so realistic, so beautiful, exactly the way it should have been. I applaud Courtney Summers for her courage in writing such a poignant and important story and in ending it so fearlessly.The format of this book reminded me of a documentary format. Almost like I was watching "Making a Murderer", where you follow the series of events that occurred to someone through the eyes of radio producer, West McCray, who following Mary Beth's request (who was like a grandmother to Sadie and basically raised her), is determined to find Sadie and to get to the bottom of things. He does this through a podcast titled ‘The Girls’ to record and report his findings through episodes. At first, he is reluctant to go on this hunt, but his employer basically pushes him to do it. Once he starts his journey, he finds himself drawn into the lives of these people and especially that of Sadie.Sadie is nineteen years old, and has spent her whole life protecting her younger sister, Mattie. Their mom was a junkie, who eventually abandons them, and Sadie makes it her life's mission to protect her sister, first from her mom, then from her mom's countless boyfriends, and finally from life in general. Only Sadie realizes she couldn't protect her well enough, when Mattie is found dead in a ditch. A year later, when the case is closed and the police making little effort in the investigation to find her killer, Sadie sets out to find him herself.We read this story in alternating perspectives, one told by Sadie and the other by West, and it is executed to perfection. I loved Sadie's character, her strength, her stutter and how she managed it, her self-loathing, yet unconditional love for her sister that continued to drive her long after she was gone. I found myself falling in love with Sadie and the incredible selflessness and disregard to her own safety. I found myself rooting for her and applauding her craftiness in getting the information she needed. Her quest to avenging her sister was so pure, so honest, and I hated the guilt that she lived in, and wished I could comfort her and give her the love that she deserved. Sadie broke my heart.I also loved how Summers was able to show us so many different perspectives, and how well she was able to illustrate the "there's a different side to every story" phrase.It's not an easy book to read. There's a lot of violence and shocking content to get through. Topics discussed and portrayed are disturbing and sensitive and dark, but they are also real and thought-provoking and honest.Sadie needs to be read. Sadie is an important book. Sadie is real.

On a reread, there are still a lot of things I'm troubled by with this novel. I don't know Summers's history - and it's none of my business - but I feel uncomfortable, as a survivor of CSA, with non-survivors writing narratives like this. Of revenge. Also, I just don't find it particularly original, or fresh, though that's a much less complicated feeling.The ending also feels like a cop-out.I just feel like PTSD and trauma were handled a lot better in All the Rage.But there were good things, too, don't get me wrong. I still gave it three and a half stars.The way the fact that abusers can do good things at the same time as terrible things, it was good to see that. You can't tell who will do monstrous things just by looking at them.The sisterly and daughterly relationships were well done.It was written propulsively and sharply.But I can't get away from the fact that maybe people love this book because it conforms to their expectations of what CSA survivors are like, then because it truly represents us. Maybe that's unfair, but when you take on such a fraught topic, you do invite these speculations, I think.

Courtney Summers does something uncomfortably accurate with this book. She perfectly captures the reality of missing girls, how easy it is to overlook the monsters in our midst and most of all the devastation that comes with searching for answers about the loved ones you may never find. It's painfully realistic, the characters are incredibly well constructed and the unique approach is compelling.Sadie's sister died, murdered with a bludgeon to the head, and Sadie's world is completely upended. Mattie has been her sole responsibility since her deadbeat mum upped and left them, and so it makes perfect sense that Sadie would feel an unrelenting need to hunt down her killer.The story is cleverly delivered via Sadie's chapters and interspersed with a podcast called The Girls when Sadie is reported missing too. The radio presenter of the podcast is, after a tip off from Sadie's surrogate grandmother, re-tracing Sadie's steps and trying to find her before something terrible happens to her too whilst Sadie tries to find the man she plans to murder. This mixed media approach really works, it makes the situation feel so authentic with representation from the missing girl but also from the general public and the media revealing information to them as they discover new things. Quite often readers see one perspective; to see both running parallel adds a new dimension to the genre which has undeniably been lacking from similar novels.Sadie is a relentless, headstrong and frightened teenager and her narrative voice is so relatable. I loved that she was equal parts vulnerable and fierce, with a stutter she finds embarrassing and a quick hand in her pocket to stash a knife. I think she probably represents so many grieving families, desperate and heartbroken from their loss whilst angry that the person who killed their love one still gets to go on living. I think Summers has perfectly created Sadie's character; I was so invested in her and really felt like I understood her motives.There is something missing from this novel. I'm not sure what it is really, I think it's perhaps that we don't know very much about the girls lives because the chapters are short and mostly dialogue, and that the story only focuses on the impact of Sadie's case rather than the other missing girls mentioned. I think it's deliberate, a story told at distance to convey the uncomfortable nature of missing information in missing girl cases, but it still left me feeling a little too shielded from the details.Nevertheless, I think this is an intelligent and reliable portrayal of the stark reality of cases like Mattie's and the families left searching and I'd love to see Courtney Summers create more stories to continue to build on the fictional podcast.

This is one of the books I purchased in hardback. I’d heard so much about it I had to fit this in to my TBR pile.Sadies sister was murdered at the age of just thirteen. The only person in the whole wide world she loved.She goes on the hunt for the murderer, the one she believes who killed her sister.It’s told in alternating chapters between Sadie and Podcast which makes for very interesting reading.There are trigger warnings in here.Parental abandonment.PedophiliaSexual abuse and much much more.It’s not for the faint hearted.What stood out to me was the victimisation. Just because someone is loud, at the forefront and can shout and ball doesn’t mean they can’t be victims of rape and crime committed upon them.Just because someone is poor and in need doesn’t make them immune to rape, to crime, to “pillars of the community “ who are hidden rapists and abusers any less a victim.Sadies love for her sister when she came home from the hospital and the actions of love she preformed was truly tear jerking. To have a sibling that loves and adores you so much.This author has captured a truly remarkable tales that could be true. Might even be true. If not for the fictional characters it could easily be happening, yes right now in 2018.If anyone reads this and have undergone anything remotely the same in this book and you need to talk to someone, please look up an organisation NOW.An outstanding remarkable read with heart.